What to do when a child gets angry while trying to lead a group?
On a children's camp we have a group of 4 boys (around 12 years old) with no appointed leader. One of the boys is naturally trying to lead the others, but they are lazy, so it's not easy for him. The problem is that one of them is not just lazy, but he's intentionally sabotaging games and other activities. This behaviour makes the one who's trying to be their leader very angry, to the point he gets a tantrum and we have to forcibly move him away and hold him till he calms down.
There is a second boy group (around 1-2 years older), whose members get on very well.
The children could choose their groups themselves.
My question is, what can we do about this problem? Shall we put the "leader" to the other group? Or should we move the troublemaker there...?
Based on anongoodnurse's comment:
They have been together in their groups for about 11 days. Mostly, they spend together about 3-4 hours a day (during some games or other activities). Of course, we always try to explain the troublemaker that he should behave, but it's difficult because he isn't demonstrably doing anything wrong; it's just the way he "unintentionally" slows down the others etc. We haven't tried anything in order to prevent this problem yet; it only happened 2 times so now we're just begining to think what to do about it. The other boys take the "leader"-in-the-making as an actual leader - they follow him, mostly; when he gets angry, they don't laugh, they take it quite seriously, although they don't do anything about it (they just stay back).
(2)2 Comments
Sorted by latest first Latest Oldest Best
Perhaps more structure is needed from the adults in this situation. Another possibility would be explicitly to rotate leadership between the children, so they get to see the issues from both sides.
Commend him for his leadership. If his behaviors seems "bossy an unwanted" it's because he hasn't learned how to use his natural leadership effectively yet. Teach him. Explain that leadership is not about forcing people to do things, it's about setting an example, being a pioneer among his peers. These skills take years to perfect.
And whatever you do, please ignore people who want to treat your little leader like a burden. He has a special talent that requires some nurturing, not a behavior problem.
Terms of Use Privacy policy Contact About Cancellation policy © freshhoot.com2025 All Rights reserved.