Substitutions for 'which' and 'for which' that maintain the sentence's meaning
I am having a bit of a problem trying to substitute the words which and for without changing too much the meaning/flow of the sentence. I have tried the thesaurus, synonyms, etc with no luck.
I achieved a strong 2:1 in X at Y University and excelled in modules studied during my final year, for many of which I received a First. This included a Financial Analysis and Control module for which I attained a strong First (72%) for a financial performance analysis of the Z Company.
"A First" (UK Grade) is like an "A" in the United States; I know it can be kind of bizarre when reading if you're not used to it.
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Will this do?
I achieved a strong 2:1 in X at Y University and excelled in modules studied during my final year, and received a First in many of them. They included a Financial Analysis and Control module in which I attained a strong First (72%) for a financial performance analysis of Company Z.
You basically have to rephrase to get rid of "whiches". Also, there is nothing wrong with using for which in moderation. I only removed one "which" because the second by itself was just fine.
I like dr?65 ?'s advice for the first sentence. For the second, try:
In my Financial Analysis and Control module I
attained a strong First (72%) for a financial performance analysis of
the Z Company.
This not only removes the which, but also leaves the sentence with a stronger main verb--attained instead of the wimpier included.
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