: I just made a song, its called "Ain't going there no way no how". Bards are useless cowards, how do I make them useful in combat? This guy said he was an adventurer, we paid him to help us on a mission to kill some orcs.

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I just made a song, its called "Ain't going there no way no how". Bards are useless cowards, how do I make them useful in combat?
This guy said he was an adventurer, we paid him to help us on a mission to kill some orcs. Because screw orcs!
Turns out the guy really is just an useless bard, his sword is just for show, all he can do is sing and play a stupid small harp. Totally not worth the money, but the contract was clear....we had to pay in advance and the guy had great charisma so we couldn't refuse.
Now we are stuck with the useless idiot and we can't kill him, might as well use him to get the job done.
How can I use a bard to kill 30 orc warriors (not all at once), considering our team composed of 4 excellent fighters and a useless bard. Our plan was to just get chased by a bunch of orcs on horseback and lure them into traps but the bard is not even a skilled rider, he would just fall into the traps instead of skipping them.
Wasting money is something I hate, and I invested into that guy, might as well make an use out of him!
I need a way to give this useless bard an use in combat, what can I do?

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