How hard do I burp my baby?
The "howtos" out there don't really show you how hard to pat the baby when burping it. They seem to focus on positions and such, but they stop short of actually doing it.
I want to know that I'm patting/rubbing him hard enough to be useful, and not so hard that I would make him uncomfortable (or worse, I suppose). Use comparisons like "as hard as you would knock on a bedroom door while trying not to wake someone if they are sleeping", or simply link to a video where someone is actually burping a baby (especially one that does not burp easily!)
My baby is 1 month old.
edit: I just want to add that there are several good answers here. Thanks!
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I have had almost immediate results when I have the baby with her head over my shoulder and her abdomen on my upper chest/shoulder. Upright, allowing the gas to travel upward.
Then putting two fingers (Index and Middle) on her belly, gently applying pressure, enough that if you pushed on your own hand, you wouldn't see any white around your finger, but when you lift off, it quickly fades back to your normal skin color. In other words, barely at all.
Then wiggle the fingers like you were scratching something without actually leaving the spot. So if you did it on your own hand, you'd see your skin moving under your fingers, with your fingers staying fixed on the spot.
If that doesn't work, sometimes placing the baby face down over your thigh with slight pressure on her belly, while supporting her weight partially, because if they are gassy, it could hurt if there is too much weight on there.
I've never really needed to pat anything that was audible.. Just gently tapping. Keeping in mind, the areas that collect gas are NOT the lungs, and rib cage, but the abdomen.
Here's something that might help you to feel more comfortable.
Rest and keep your thumb and the base of your hand (almost to the knuckles) on the baby's side/back, so that the only part of your hand moving are your fingers and knuckles. Then pat away as comfortable. If you do it this way, it's quite unlikely that you will get enough force in your fingers without exaggerating/unnatural movement to cause any discomfort.
Alternate patting and circular rubbing movements. If you don't get a burp after a minute or so and the baby is content, you can feel comfortable that you've done your job. If he's fussing, you can walk and pay/rub.
The object of burping isn't to whack the air bubble out of him (so it's ok if it's very gentle); the object is to get the smaller bubbles to come together and 'break apart' into one big bubble, which he is then upright enough to let out of his stomach. It's just a matter of time and gentle agitation; not much is needed.
Every baby is different. My first child burped on her own, or else right when we would pick her up. But or second required patting, rubbing, jostling, MORE patting, and some harder patting. My advice is start out gentle, and if that doesn't work, step it up a notch. It is extremely unlikely that you will somehow hurt your infant just from the motion of burping.
We found that the act of changing seating position sometimes gets a burp. We now do this on purpose and call it baby yoga.
We:
lay the infant out, butt on our knee/thigh
SLOWLY move them forward to a seated position. think of a slow abdominal crunch
lean slowly back
repeat and smile at cute expression
We alternate "baby yoga", traditional pats< and rubbing their back with heel of your hand.
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